Her notepad poems Derailed train of thought by Dean Thorpe
My mind is a scary place to be,
It’s a place nobody wants to see.
I have spent most of my life in there,
Hiding from a world that doesn’t care.
My mind is a lonely place to be,
Nobody here can understand me.
The conflict of light and dark inside.
A battle from which I cannot hide,
My mind is a deadly place to be,
The voices inside want to hurt me.
They are trapped and can never escape,
So they try to poison me with hate.
My mind is a random place to be,
Voices always try to confuse me.
The quest to focus has always failed,
My train of thought has been derailed.
My mind is a noisy place to be,
A whirlwind of voices surrounds me.
Only music can block them all out,
It protects me when they scream and shout.
My mind is a dark prison for me,
No way for me to ever be free.
I don’t want to go out of my mind,
As a way back I might never find.
My mind is the only place for me,
The place I still always want to be.
A strange place that I can call my home.
Where I can sit proud upon my throne.
About this poem
Another poem about my mental health, my mind really is a scary place for me to be sometimes. I see and hear things every day, they are not always negative, but when you are trying to sleep and they are talking or shouting continuosly it makes it very hard to sleep, even if they are being nice! Everybody has internal monologue voices that they can use to work through problems and discuss ideas with, but these are not like that. My voices are completely out of my control, it's like doing a flat share with a dozen people, sometimes a LOT more, most of which don't get on and they often want to talk random drunk style crap at 3am when all I want to do is sleep. The closest thing I can describe it is like being in a room with a dozen television sets all turned up loud, all with different channels on and there is no remote control!! I do have multiple diagnosed mental health conditions, but I am not a danger to anybody, only myself!